Embarkment

Well, it would seem that I am at last hopping onto the college blog boat, ready to document my thoughts and experiences as I embark for the UW. I still have a couple weeks before school begins, but I have seen many friends off and as our paths part, for a time, I have begun to see that this is, indeed, the beginning of a new stage of life.

Oddly enough, as my childhood begins coming to a close (or so they tell me), I found myself sitting with Erin on the steps of our old elementary school, reminiscing, and examining the part of our journey which now lays behind us.

As I began thinking about it, though, I came to realize that childhood really doesn’t end with my first step onto campus.

In some ways, I realize, I still feel very much like a child. There is still a part of me that wonders just how grown-ups “do life”, and isn’t sure I’ll ever learn to manage it myself. I want to make something of my life, but I don’t even know where to begin. The world is so big, and I am so, so small. I think I may always feel that way, to a certain extent, but I hope to let it be a source of wonder and curiosity, rather than fear.

On the other hand, I can’t help but take note of the ways that adulthood penetrates our adolescent worlds, long before we’re ever considered to be of age. I don’t remember the first time I experienced this (though I certainly remember subsequent episodes), but I remember that with it came the realization that my world was not so small, or secure, as I once believed.

I wonder if, perhaps, this is just the way growing up happens. Bit by bit, real life slips in through the cracks . . . sometimes a rude awakening, and other times nothing more than a gust of wind. However it comes, we learn from the pains and triumphs of real life (or perhaps we ignore them or give into despair) . . . and then one day we we wake up and realize we’ve grown up, and life is at once more wonderful and beautiful and frightening than we ever imagined.

It’s a process that never fails to amaze me, and I am so excited to continue growing up at college and beyond. The past couple of years have been quite a ride, but I am so happy with where they have taken me, and I’m looking forward to seeing where the next four years lead!