The life and resliance in this child's eyes reminds me that the hearts in Haiti are very real, and in desperate need of prayer (image via World Vision)
I return to my blog, not so much to give an update on school (more on that later), but to muse on a topic that’s been on my mind lately: compassion. On the 12th of this month, Haiti was devastated by disaster, and the world mourned with those affected by the tragedy. Less than three weeks later, it seems that the media has largely moved on from the event, focusing once more on the economy and, this week, the state of the union address. Preparing for a night of prayer/fund raising for Haiti, I found myself largely in the same position. Tears welled up in my eyes as I read the first news reports, and I prayed constantly for the week or so following the earthquake, yet I’m finding it easier and easier to distance myself and focus back on the things that make my life less than perfect. Even as I collected stories to pray over tomorrow night, I caught myself wanting to look for “just the right story”, glossing over the fact that the pain (and the resilience and hope) of these people is very much a reality, in the most raw and honest sense of the word.
I realize it’s my way of coping, since the idea of opening my heart to suffering and death is overwhelming, and even frightening at times. But more and more, I’m realizing that to see the world through God’s eyes . . . to let my heart beat with His, it is something I must begin to consider. I cannot bear the brunt of the burden: I know I would crumble under the weight of it. But if His heart breaks for each and every broken life in Haiti (and across the world, for that matter), shouldn’t I care for the country as a whole, or for those whose stories I have read? I know I am very limited when it comes to sending financial aid, or volunteering. But I can be desperate in prayer, on their behalf, and the hand of God will be where I cannot be (and His power, of course, is greater than any I possess).
What do you think? How have the stories from Haiti affected you? Or, how do you balance compassion for others and remain centered in your own life?
Everyday Circumstances 
I was at the IMA when I first heard about the earthquake. I was on the treadmill watching CNN on one of the televisions mounted to the ceiling. As I realised what had happened, I became progressively more upset, but I kept running and finished my workout. I was pretty quiet the rest of the night. By the next day, I was fine and I hadn’t really given it a thought until someone mentioned it.
It’s extremely true that we have a choice as to whether or not we let something affect us. In some ways, I understand it — we can’t just stop living our daily lives because we’re upset over a disaster that is afflicting other people. In some ways, I think it’s horrible — we are capable of watching the news, being glad it didn’t happen to us, and just shutting these people out without a second thought.
I think that what you said makes me feel better about the second part of that reality. A person really would need a godlike capacity to truly appreciate all the suffering that has happened and continues to happen in Haiti (and so many other places in the world!) and I know that if I opened myself up to that, I would just crumble. We really can’t be blamed for having defences.
When things like this happen, I usually donate what money I can spare and then think about all the good it will do alongside everyone else’s small contribution. And when I’m not doing anything with my thoughts or emotions (like when I’m at the IMA), I let myself feel the suffering as much as I can so I don’t become too disconnected from it.
Sometimes I feel like I think of everything too abstractly. Maybe because I write too much and spend too much time in books or other fictional worlds. Sometimes I write down what I think, but then it seems even more abstract to me.
But on the other hand, I guess I spend a lot of time working with World Vision even when it’s not Famine season. A lot of the time when I buy something I think of how many kids it could feed. I guess that’s sometimes I how I make it more real so I can remember how there are people hurting out there. Sometimes I think of a group of kids who are real and living. I guess sometimes it bothers me when the only time people think about those kids are times like these. Haiti has needed help for ages, yet they only get attention now? Obviously they need help more than ever, but I don’t know. Sometimes I wonder what other people think about or if they realize that these people needed help years before the earthquake, and for years after.